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H

hutch

Beaten by Chris Wright
5 January 2003
YES. Right so I noticed evo-web is basically just full of forums which are full of topics which are very specific to things. E.g. If I wanted a new clock, I reckon I'd end up making a thread and it'd get locked with somebody saying "This belongs in the clock thread". I'm not moaning, I'm making a point very badly but anyway.....

YES, SO TO LIVEN THINGS UP A BIT I'M GOING TO CARRY ON TYPING IN CAPS FOR THE REST OF THIS SENTENCE THEN IN THE NEXT SENTENCE I'LL EXPLAIN WHAT THIS THREAD IS ABOUT. Unfortunately this sentence has been hi-jacked by the writers of Lost so you're going to have to be put on another cliffhanger and wait for the next sentence.

IN THIS THREAD I WANT YOU TO ASK ME A QUESTION. ANY QUESTION YOU LIKE. I KNOW THIS HAS PROBABLY BEEN DONE BEFORE BUT HEY, I'M FAR MORE WITTY AND CHARMING THAN THOSE PREVIOUS PEOPLE SO I RECKON THIS THREAD WILL BE THE BEST BLOODY THREAD IN THE HISTORY OF THE INTERNET INNIT.

PEACE. :triangle:
 
Not that i'd have to explain the thread anyway, considering the self explanatory thread title there.
Unless you're French or dead, I reckon it's pretty easy to figure out.
 
Did you donate on Red Nose Day?

Are you still writing that driving instructor sitcom?
 
Jack Bauer said:
Did you donate on Red Nose Day?
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I have never donated on Red Nose Day. The reasons for this are,
1) I'm fucking skint
2) I believe if you want to give to charity, you'll give on your own will, rather than give just because some half talented BBC comedian took the piss out of some completely opposite to them public figure.

Jack Bauer said:
Are you still writing that driving instructor sitcom?
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I never even started writing it, I just gave you a couple of ideas for it on MSN. I'd say I'd do it when I have some free time, but when I have plenty of free time I tend to just perv at people on myspace and choke on my own rage whilst reading the football threads on here.
I considered doing stand up comedy a few weeks ago. There's this comedy club called The Frog and Bucket in Manchester where on a Monday night they have 'Beat The Frog'. They basically give 3 memebers of the audience these big boards with a Frog on, and the comedian has to survive 5 minutes. If all the boards get held up then the comedian gets booted off. I reckon I could do it, some of the acts are fucking awful. Again though, no courage. If I get hammered I might send an email applying but it'll probably just read 'WATNA GOO ONM YOUR SHOW COMEDAIN THING IN MACR' and i'd probably send it to you mate.
 
I'm going to write the script for 'THE POSTMAN' first though. Do you remember that? A Postman called Pat. Something goes hilariously wrong whilst he's on his round and he gets smacked.
Then he goes back to the Post Office and his boss goes,
"Oh here comes Postman Pat and his black and white EYES!"
Gold.
 
HAHA, Hutch, seriously, you know you can trust me; you have to send me copies of these scripts, and you seriously have to start making them. We both love Harry Hill and so I know the humour would be brilliant.

Did you see that the another night? There was a program about a bloke who only ate spaghetti hoops, and the doctor recommended his girlfriend eat them for a week too, to experience his malnutrition. Well, the next day, she has some on toast, and says "that is the most disgusting thing I've ever had to do for my boyfriend" - Harry just looks at the camera going :|...

Thank GOD for emoticons, otherwise you'd have never "got" that.

Anyway, more questions.

  • Why are England so shit?
  • No, seriously, why?
  • Is uni the best thing you've ever done or do you wish you could just kill everyone there with a big rusty chainsaw and then saw your own head off at the end?
  • Daddy or chips?
 
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Ever wondered why those guys in the editing threads waste so much of their lives designing balls when they could be out meeting women?
 
El Diego, you do realise that I did that for two years of my life... *Goes to cry in the corner*

Hutch is a trainee graphics designer, so he will be able to tell you why.
 
Posting while drunk is neither big or clever hutch
 
Jack Bauer said:
[*]Why are England so shit?
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Because they meet up once every few months so don't have the chance to train with their team mates day in day out and get to know their games getting a real understanding with each other. This is why International football is shit and should be scrapped.

Jack Bauer said:
No, seriously why?
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Because our players are massively overrated. The term world class is banded about WILLY NILLY, most of our players would probably be shit in the premiership if they weren't surrounded by 10 other world class players from different countries. I'm not bothered though, United > England.

Jack Bauer said:
Is uni the best thing you've ever done or do you wish you could just kill everyone there with a big rusty chainsaw and then saw your own head off at the end?
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It is the best thing I've ever done. As much as I love my friends at home, they're not very open minded or anything. I've met loads of interesting, different people....they actually find me funny, I go out on the piss almost every single night on my loan. I'm doing the easiest fucking degree in the history of the world. Literally, I'm in Monday morning for a 2 hour lecture, Tuesday and Thursday afternoons for 2 hours each where we have 'critique' on our current projects. I, and many others rarely turn up on a Tuesday or Thursday so it's all gravy. They give us simple projects and give us ridiculous time lengths such as 2 months to design a logo and stick it on a letterhead/business card etc.
ABSOLUTE PIECE OF PISS. I LOVE IT.

Jack Bauer said:
Daddy or chips?
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Daddy. He usually makes my tea, so if I didn't have him I wouldn't have nice chips.
 
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Jack Bauer said:
Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen in love with?
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Yes. Also, whenever this song is played in a club, Teenage Kicks will follow it, or the other way round. I was at a retro night in Manchester and it came on, I said to my mates "I bet Teenage Kicks is on next, it always is". It came on, they were amazed for some reason and told me to predict the next song. I just spurted out- "I don't know....Blondie- Atomic"
IT FUCKING CAME ON.
I then tried to predict the next song to be 99 Red Balloons but some James Brown song came on to put an end to my witchcraft. :(

El Diego said:
Ever wondered why those guys in the editing threads waste so much of their lives designing balls when they could be out meeting women?
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I've never stepped in the editing forum apart from for the odd pisstake thread. If that's what they want to do then fair play to them, but I don't want them coming crying to me when they're the 40 Year Old Virgin. I was somewhat of a geek between the ages of 15 and 17, then I turned 18 and discovered the social wonder that is going out and getting hammered and I've never looked back.

csaunders said:
Hutch,
What happend to Joost?
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some site said:
Joost is an interactive, IP-based TV software system from the people who brought you Kazaa and Skype, Niklas Zennström and Janus Friis, considerably richer after the $2.6bn purchase of the telephony start-up by eBay.
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That's what happened to him. Shame.
 
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Haha! I like Hutch, he is funny and never takes stuff so seriosuly on here!

No muff too tough, we dive at five!
 
Stringer Bell said:
How much was the loan you got when you started Uni and when do you have to pay it back (please be honest)?
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They assess everyone individually. I managed to get £3,300 for the year which is 3 installments of 1,300. That's just the maintenance loan to live on basically, then there's the 3 grand a year for the course which they just give straight to the uni. I have to pay it back when I'm earning over 15 grand a year. At that point it's paid back at something stupid like a fiver a week.
If you're never earning over 15 grand a year after 25 years the debt is scrapped. :)
It's really not as doom and gloom as people say.
 
That crafty bastard, he's owed me a fiver for a hundred years now.

Little Britain; funny, shit or offensive?
 
Fucking wank. I hate it. Gays, freaks and celebrity cameos, that's all it is. Get into Peep Show if you haven't already mate. It's brilliant.
 
Hutch, you are defo a man after my own heart!

1. I am cooking garlic chicken right NOW as I read one of your posts. I am gonna put it in a sarnie with mayo.

2. Peep Show rules. I got every series (1, 2 & 3). Very funny. Super Hans is awesome! "I can't get enough of this crack - it's so moreish." :lol:
 
CWright said:
Why have you come back to the forums?
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Because I want to because I want to. If it's good enough reason for Billie Piper its good enough for me.

Jack Bauer said:
Why did you go?

What are the best sweets in the world?
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I went because the place lacks personality apart from the odd person. It's fucking shit.
The best sweets in the world are Asda price midget gems.
 
This place has lacked personailty for ages especially since the admin team decided that Hiter's regime is the way forward (in other words, if they disagree with you or you slate their football team then BAN!)

That is why I am here, to brighten this place up :waits to be slaughtered:
 
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